„there are a lot of paths; i choose the one of the heart“

don juan


if don juan was a ‘brujo’ or an animal shapeshifter -, as this is what a nagual= nahual affirmed to be -, i can not certainly say, as i have never experienced this w(R)ay. i do know what a ‘brujo’ is nowadays, and i have heard a lot of stories in south america from indigenous tribes about people who were able to transform in ‘anacondas’ and jaguars*. one can say, there is a relation to the animal totems, known not only from the indigenous tribes of north america, but also from ancient populations and ethnic groups worldwide, especially in africa and asia, used as well in their shamanic rituals to gain power and knowledge (i think, that there is a hidden knowledge related to the human dna and the blood linages rooted to the plant and animal dna)

myself, i see a nahual as a time traveler -, one that can shift between the dimensions, a man of knowledge and power; this is what i have learned from my initiator, that he said to be connected with carlos castaneda’s nagual* group; he, and the ones that i have met, in this and in the other dimensions, have filled my earthly existence with inner strength, passion, wisdom and gratitude for every single moment of life= alchemy

a magic, known as the zero point of the heart; a state of being between the living breath and the void. a portal that accesses inter-dimensions and connects to higher knowledge -, a meta(morph)oasis that can be achieved with divine will and personal effort. without the pulse of this physical and etheric drum / ear= the h.ear.t, i would be only a living dead-spirit, lost in oblivion of oneself. indeed, the direct experience with shamanism has re(member)ed me, that the heart is a rose flower and its only bourn is to shine magnificent and be -, awakening with its mystical scent every living cell of the blood= holly grail, into the immortal life

this profound alchemistical process could not be achieved without the protection of its own guardians, the thorns; without the keepers of all knowledge and life, the wise elders and powerful shamans who guard the rose= heart and guide it to its self-realization – even before it is already born -, the rose could not be able to exist at all. they are the ‚tricksters‘ using obstacles and challenging oneself, or the ‘gate keepers’ linking to higher realms of consciousness, for those who are willing and have the power to transform (die and rebirth spiritually) in order to gain knowledge of self

thus, shamanism is pure alchemy!

i acknowledge it as the primordial marriage of the elements -, the unconditional love of spirit (triangle of water / feminine wisdom) in union with the eternal transformation of matter (triangle of fire / masculine creative power), at the center of the crystalline light of the heart (triangle of ether / the divine child) -, the alpha-omega logos central sun. a path of awareness, self-love, gratitude, inner strength and harmony that leads to self-mastery and spiritual inheritance. an ancient purposeful way that empowers life and connects with nature and all the living creation, as all is nourished from the great spirit

and instead of all the complexity of the shamanic paths and their multi-disciplinary techniques and practices, i believe the goal of true shamanism is to lead to the rose-quartz and golden light within the heart -, the etheric paradise and eternal kingdom of light that can only be accessed through the emerald portals of the bio-computer mothership= garden eve and through its psychedelic= soul revealing, wonder-full plants, the entheogens (i know there are a lot of ways to gain knowledge of self. very often, when we reach a high state of consciousness, we do the mistake to rest there, because we believe to know all that is. a mushroom for instance, can show you much more than a zen meditation or a practice to seek illumination. it can access you to a space of superconductivity, a hyper-consciousness of bliss that you have never imagined; or a cactus could teach you to heal yourself with your own power using your telepathic abilities)

indigenous tribes knew that in the psychoactive plants is kept the memory of life alive! they have used their organic bio-logical substances to cleanse and restore everything anew, like to remove implants in the inner water= blood and shadows in the inner fire= prana. they were aware and still are, that the psyche-delic spirit of nature can recode complete the dna and connect it back to its origin; the akasha records who are the central data bases of the solar disc suns that transmit via holographic tele-communication, in decoded waves, all datas of the alpha omega galactic wombs of all hyperspace


* note1

a recent story telling about people who transform themselves in animals happened in 2016, when i was visiting the village of a young indian friend in the region of tena, in ecuador. he wished to show me a magical place, his grandfather’s land, next to hatun yacu river. that day, while i was swimming, a big beautiful shaped stone attracted my attention and i reached it to sit on it. its energy felt very warm to me and i shared this feeling with my friend. “my grandfather said once, when he initially brought me here to teach me about plant medicine, that this stone is magical. he often saw a jaguar coming out from this stone and walk through his land to the waterfall. one day, he sat to meditate and saw two lovers embraced with each other shapeshifting in a jaguar. every night for many nights he saw the same vision and he decided to speak with his mother. she told him, that there was a legend from the ancient times about a very beautiful man and woman who were very much in love. our ancestors who lived here knew them as ‘semidioses’= half-gods. one day, someone saw them diving in ‘hatun yacu’ and never came out; instead of them, a jaguar appeared from the waters, exactly from where this stone stands today. people in the village, they have been transformed into a jaguar -, the one that my grandfather saw.” his story made sense to me; i was related to semi-gods or gods and their supernatural powers (solar civilizations, as we know in central and south america). but, what if they were not semi-gods, rather men of great power, of luminous ‘eggs’ and extra-temporal abilities? this area was known to hide mysteries that a lot have protected for many years and still do (not even the spaniards were able to get to those places in search for gold). therefore, i believe in the the magic of llaganates; from my own experiences and due the storytelling of the man who know this area the most, my dear friend guillermo -, the son of the last quitschua leader of a nomad tribe that lived exactly the time as the missionaries came, and with whom i have walked this land a lot. 

that night, we stayed on the land next to ‘hatun yacu’ to feel in the power, as my friend said. we lit a fire and cooked ‘guayusa’ and i shared with him an ‘amanita mascaria’. the milky-way was clear and the light of the stars joined us long time. we had a long cleansing talk, also long deep silence that took me to a deep soul journey. i was interested to find out why the ancestors of this land have brought me to this particular place. i have decide to lay down to warm myself by the fire and nourishing myself with the sound of nature, i fall asleep. in vision, i saw a jaguar walking the small path very calm, without to notice me, towards a waterfall. i remember to woke up with the sunshine on my face. delightful i shared this story with my friend that he surprised me, as he wanted to bring me to the waterfall. “if the jaguar appeared to your vision, this is a sign. i have to show you this place.” what exactly has happened that day to the waterfall, it is important for me and the knowledge that can be shared only with those that have access to such wisdom. i can humble say, that i was not only happy to get confirmation, why i have been visiting this area for so many years, or why always synchronicity was coming together; the information that i have accessed was so breathe taken that my friend said: “only my grandfather, myself and now you, know!” it makes no difference to speak out now (there will be sure a moment). the most important is, a piece of information linked me to an other piece, and then all pieces together have made a whole image -, an information that was nowhere to find, in no scientific research or archeological report. in the coming days, i have visited an other dear friend, a medicine man. i wished to talk to him regarding his knowledge to the ancient times and the ‘shapeshifters’. he stated: “yes sure, there was an age of full power! there were a lot of witnesses over the past years who have seen others to transform in anacondas and jaguars.


in 2004, when i met the nagual leader ‘roberto’ in nyc, the books of carlos castaneda were known and unknown to me. for some reason, every time i was about to read them, i have been holding back. all i knew about castaneda that time were the stories that ‘roberto’ has ever told me about him: “i am carlos castaneda’s right hand and new nagual leader” (i am sure, that he said an other name, when he sawed me a photograph about him, and i am sure that he said, carlos castaneda was the name of the writer of the books). due to the deep alchemy that happened between myself and ‘roberto’ -, as we were meeting again after thousand of years -, i have never doubted anything and have never questioned anything. if all that he has ever told me about the teachings of his nagual teacher and the group, that he was leading himself, were true or not, i can never know. and to say the truth, in the state of awareness i was when i met him, no prove was necessary. i have met ‘roberto’ physically only three times in my life and can certainly say, that all the experiences with him during my initiations have confirmed, that he was who he claimed to be, as he knew exactly who i was spiritually from our first meeting. i admit, that it took him some months to convince me to meet him in 2005 (and be initiated by him), for the reason that i was already practicing the path of the peaceful warrior with the daoist master, wang dongfeng (at least eight hours daily qigong, thai chi, kung fu and feng shui) -, and my light body (luminous egg) was already activated, that means, i was consciously experiencing my higher self. an other reason that i haven’t replied to his call immediately, i believe to be his voice; it has sounded as an echo to my heart -, i guess, i got scared and was not ready to take the responsibility, but i went for it, as the synchronicity and white alchemy of the goddess was proven

in 2018, during a period of quantum activations in europe, and during the creation of this website, i came across with information about carlos castaneda and his tensegrity® group that has surprised me. living all these years in remote places, i had never related to any other nagual physically, except ‘roberto’ and later, ‘ge’ in south america. for this reason, i had no idea for the incidents that took place, for the female apprentices that were disappeared after his death, nor if ‘roberto’ was part of this group of people, nor that the academic society -, including his colleagues and authors like wanderdling, or other skeptics -, have doubted his true identity. fraud or not, personally, i don’t mind. i don’t give importance, if ‘don juan matus’ was really a mexican yaqui from sonora, or if he was the person that carlos castaneda claimed to meet. i know, don juan is a true nahual and has ever existed in a non-physical form -, as far my personal experience during my shamanic practice with ‘roberto’. (surely, i would have agreed with the statement of barbara g. myerhoff “to have advised carlos castaneda to leave out the word sorcerer or yaqui” for a misunderstanding that has finally happened, as don juan is not a ‘brujo’, rather a ‘nahual’= master of knowledge, a sorcerer -, a difference that can only be assumed with long, sufficient and direct experience with the practice of metaphysics and shamanism and the examination of its various paths! (for my own point of view and knowledge, the world ‘sorcerer’ is appropriate for the world nahual, as it derives from the word source= universe= energy. the confusion that has happened in our days is linked with the time of (dark) atlantis where a huge conflict has arisen between the sorcerers, keepers of knowledge and their apprentices -, the so called ‘witches’ and ‘brujos’ (nowadays), who have separated themselves from the source of pure energy and merged with evil dark forces to gain power and control against others.) i think, don juan speaks about it, in a way or an other, through carlos castaneda in his books: “i am a toltec, an atlantian. these pyramids have existed long before the mayas and the aztecs.” (perhaps castaneda knew this information from his friend alex apostolidis, a field director doing salvage excavations and archaeological surveys for ucla, as wanderlings writes in his website. no matter how the writer came along with this information, i know, that there is a wisdom written in the heart and in the living memory of the spirit that can only be achieved from those that have always kept this knowledge alive. so, it makes no difference to me, if don juan brought to the surface the truth about the pyramids in mexico, or alex apostolidis. important is, that this information is true, regardless if the science and the academic lodges wish to hid it!) the most significant is, that carlos castaneda has intended to speak out (wherever his source of knowledge came from), awakening the human memory (28 million copies in 17 languages) into the light consciousness and the psychedelic (=soul revealing) nature, as in his first two books, the teachings of don juan: a yaqui way of knowledge in 1968 and a separate reality: further conversations with don juan in 1971; stories that made people to question, to believe or to doubt -, an important shift for the collective consciousness that happens nowadays (see: terence mckenna’s opinion on don juan). 

as far as now, as it concerns the teachings of don juan, they were in a way or another always known to me; from other sources of shamanism, metaphysical literature, my grandmothers, also through the teachings, practice and discipline with master wang dongfeng (during a period of five years). the first book i have red, it was, tales of power, that ‘roberto’ had from carlos (through his nagual initiator) and which has given to me after my departure and first initiation. few others, like journey to ixtlan or the eagle’s gift, they amused me rather to surprise me. magical passes, has interested me initially, but when i bought the book, it didn’t resonated with me. perhaps i was critical about it, due to my practice in qigong, thai chi / kung fu and wyda, the druid exercises; for this reason i have never used it, but i am sure it has helped to achieve inner strength under the guiding of its teachers, who i have never met. as far as tensegrity® facilitator, instructor and creative co-director at cleargreen, beata murez and the workshops she leads with bruce wagner, i am skeptical; being a nagual is to me different than being a tensegrity® teacher. i guess, taisha abalar makes it clear enough

therefore, as nagual= keeper of knowledge, always evolving and seeking to gain complete power, i found myself responsible to clarify and stand as humble as i can: “no science, intellectual lodge or academical institution can justify my words or prove, what i have ever experienced as real or unreal, as none really can define what is reality and what is not!” i finish this note with further text:

“rationalism in confrontation with the weird edges, is what always worked for me, in other words, if you are a true believer, if you have some pre-package philosophy, then you are going to miss a great deal, because you are pre-programmed to ignore what doesn’t fit into your model, and it doesn’t matter what your model is, but if you are simply the open minded sceptic / witness, and then, if you push to the phenomenal world, you know, go to the highest mountains, the oldest cities, the deepest deserts, the most remote jungles, and just simply put yourself in these circumstances, the cosmic giggle can get at you. you know, it can’t get you if you are pursuing your job getting messages from matthew and son, or whatever is you’ve got going. but if you will tear the human atom of your individuality out of the collectivity and set yourself into a wilderness, a desert, an uninhabited island, then this thing can rise out of the depths and communicate if it chooses, shape your life, for sure blow your mind” terence mckenna, true hallucinations